"There Are Many Meanings

 'IN' life, but only one reason 'FOR' life," - sle.  I am trying to find my meaning in life, for I have already found the reason for life.  Guess my question now is how to get back into writing my Head Winds & Epitaphs remaining episodes.  Need that one person to stand by me and give me the strength to want to move ahead.  It is so easy to keep moving through life, but purpose to do more than just keep up the motions.  To get ahead and be more.  It felt so good to be around someone the other day that I could talk to and relate to.  Having my goal of starting anew in the new year is helping me stand firm.  Learning everyday how strong Sweet Pea can be.  It wouldn't take long for her to forget me.  But oh, how much more life will be harder for her.  A mother that just doesn't have common sense, that is so self-righteous, thinks she knows so much of the world but can't see a phony standing in front of her.  The b*stard has but one thing in the back of his mind, he got it and he wants more.  Just buying his time until he gets what he wants or until he got all that he can and, then, finds someone else.  No decency to him.  Trash.  Can't think about it.  Guess we all, including Sweet Pea, have to walk our own life whichever way it goes.  Just, "What mother doesn't want what is best for their child?"  You don't surround them with trash.  Again, trash begets trash.  Time for bed.  School tomorrow.  Can only keep praying.  God does work in mysterious ways.  Took a little small step to getting out of here.  Thinking one day, hopefully, I am still alive, someone will read my writings and get it out there.  Let people decide if they can understand what I am trying to see.  To get them 'thinking' would help my soul rest.  Oh, she mowed the property today.  Forgot, the dad is coming this weekend.  I just hope the dad will be there for Sweet Pea before she falls too far.  If nothing else, the b*stard's son will get Sweet Pea into a ton of trouble.  He is such a bad influence.  I have got to quit trying to make sense of how some people can be.  Forsake family except when you need them.  To give trash the shirt off your back but make your family give you their's.  Tomorrow.  Life is hard, so why would you want to make it harder.  Sweet Pea was so sweet this morning.  I served her pancakes.  Mom wasn't up, yet.  Guess a hard night.  Just hope he left a tip.  Had to throw that one in.  Just shaking my head.  Is it that one can't feel or one is afraid to feel?  Life's questions.  Time for Ozempic shot, breakfast, little news, then, to work.  May have to go to Saudi Arabia.  Sure they pay well.  Shot went well.  Don't like the pin caps very much, but gets the job done.  Breakfast time.  Nice drive to work.  Little cold today, but not bad.  Beautiful weather, clear skies.  Got ready for class.  Thinking about midterm grades and have an advising event Monday, so will have to go to school a little earlier.  Modern technology.  Amazing.  A Christmas movie, for the millionth time, but still notice things I didn't see before.  God is a funny man.  Little freeze last night.  My niece is in Key West for the week with a fantastic husband, the kind of life style I would like Sweet Pea to live, but.  How do you not want better for your daughter?  Love Ozempic, but some popcorn balls I bought won out, haha.  Popcorn is suppose to be good for the digestive system.  Thinking of my discussion posts.  Need to get my midterm grades in by next Monday or Tuesday.  Thinking how much I have evolved physically and mentally.  The demons are gone.  The spirits I have are different.  Time to move on and do some more growing.  Age doesn't really mean too much.  Many die before my age and many live a much longer live than my age.  So, what is the big thing about age if it is legal and both are mature and can make up their own minds.  Ozempic seems to be taking away my baby fat and giving me a better body tone, it appears.  Can't wait to start the full dose.  Three more weeks.  Local lawyer Friday.  Got to get ready for that.  Sure hope this guy is more independent, in that, locals know each other pretty well.  Shall see.  News time.  The ignorance of some people.  Think they know people and they don't know sh*t.  Some people just like to cause trouble.  It is in their blood.  The big b*stard is trying to get into her pants while grabbing whatever he can and the little b*stard is just like him always trying to get into trouble, well, Sweet Pea, into trouble.  Ignorant people and trash.  Things people will do to have so-called friends.  Sacrifice their children to a lesser life.  Sweet Pea is the sweetest.  Let the dogs out tonight and she came up with her flashlight.  I don't like to let them out at night, but I do use a flashlight after the first time.  Eyes shine so that helps.  Finding a quicker way to do my discussion posts scoring.  Using the screenshot on Firefox as something new.  Schoolgirl beaten to death in Iran for not praising regime.  We, U.S., and the world stand by.  Don't have to worry about dishes.  I start the washing, but not doing much more.  God, how people can be so ungrateful and unappreciative.  Trash.  Good night.  God bless.